Sometimes…

Sometimes when

we’re on a roll

life treats us well

having friends,raising a family

then suddenly,Boom!

life punches us in the gut

we’re laid out on the floor

confused,dazed

unable to stand alone

we sit and wonder if we can go on

then suddenly-

a rush of confidence

surges through us

every nerve lights up in us

we hop back up on our feet

shaking off the moment

we’ll take a deep breath

and keep on going

life is like that sometimes

how else would we learn?

we need to spread the word

so another doesn’t fall

no matter how many tears fall

and not let life destroy us all

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choices

Today is a brand new day
now that I’ve been here

still somewhat new to the game

do I try to fit in?

and just let a potential opportunity

just fly right by?

do I try to mold my life

just like the rest

for the remainder of mine?

we are not all the same

but I try anyway

sometimes i wonder, though

should I go my own way

where there is no limit

to use my ability to it’s fullest?

that is a question I struggle to decide

while I go with the flow

trying to spread my wings

feeling frustrated, held back

someone who isn’t me today?

The Life Of A Hard Worker

I lost my job

sitting on my bed

singing the blues

pizza boxes everywhere

laying in a mess

bills are piling up

running out of food

looking for a new job

not much around

I was ready to cry

they all said no and goodbye

the phone rang

beautiful words sung in my ear

I have a job!

have to get up

days of slumber over

life has meaning now

doing things myself again

looking my best

having a job  I love

long days with no rest

for my reward

I’ll get paid

all will see

my life on my own

not looking for help

doing it all by myself

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Moving On

I’m on the road headed towards California. My sister and and her friend are there in L.A. My husband passed away a week ago after a long illness.I feel like there is no reason for me to stay in Illinois any longer  after losing him.After his burial I just packed up all my things and put them in my truck. I paid someone to take care of the house and I got in my car and headed east. For a long time, I just drove in silence. I was thinking about my husband and the tears finally started falling down my face. I need to get away from it all,take some time to grieve alone. I had to use the bathroom after a while. I got off the highway at the exit to use the facilities. I pulled into a gas station and got out of my truck. I went inside and headed straight to the bathroom.Less than 5 minutes later I came out disgusted because It smelled  bad in there. I told myself ” No more fluids until I get to L.A.!” I hurried out, got into my car, and drove off. I quickly found the entrance to the highway and got  back on.
I’ve been driving for a few hours so far and I still  had  sometime to go. I turned on my radio and found a station that played soft music. The music got me crying again-but I thought it was theraputic so I didn’t change the station. I got to thinking again-this time about what it would be like if I had kids.It hurts me to be alone so I can just imagine them hurt by the loss of their father. What if I had to tell them? The pain would be even bigger than It is right now! I wiped away the tears that were still falling and turned the music up. I guess I was going faster than I thought because I started to see signs that told me to stay in the left lane to get to where I was going(L.A). I had about two more hours before I would get there. I wondered what my hosts had in store for me. Anything is better than staying back at home right now! I just drove and and listened to music for a while. Then I saw an exit for L.A. I slowed down a little and pulled off the highway when it was safe to.A half hour later I was pulling into my sister’s driveway and honking my horn. She came running out of the house to give me a big hug. I then pulled back and looked at my sister. She looked great! She looked at me  and said  “I’m sorry you have to go through this!”She then hugged me again. My sister’s friend came out of the house and introduced herself to me. She said ” We’re here to help you through the healing process.” I smiled and said “The healing process began for me on the road here.” My sister and her friend exchanged glances. I jumped in and said ” I don’t know if I’ll ever go back home.” I stepped between them and and said “I know you two will help me make the decision when I’m ready.” We all laughed and my sister started pushing me towards the front door of the house.” Let’s get you situated here.” she said. I went inside to rest and continue my healing process.My sister’s  friend went  in right behind me.

When The Love Is Gone part 6

Mom is in the kitchen making pancakes. The kids don’t like big, thick pancakes.Mom has to make sure they’re just right or they won’t eat them. Within the next half hour she has a pile of pancakes just waiting for the kids. It doesn’t take long for the kids to notice because they were in the next room watching television.They both wander into the kitchen and see two plates with pancakes on them. Their faces light up when they see them. They each go to a plate and sit down.The son gleefully said ” Wow,pancakes today!” The daughter asked “Mom, where’s the syrup?’ Mom then grabs the bottle off the counter and pours some onto both plates. She then steps back and said “You’re welcome!” The kids looked at each other and then at Mom and said “We’re sorry-thanks for breakfast!” They then went back to eating. While they were finishing up, Mom said she had an announcement to make. The kids looked at her and waited. Mom sighed and said “This weekend’s plans have been cancelled!” Both kids faces fell. Mom quickly added “Don’t worry, Dad will take you to the amusement park next weekend!”The son asked “Is he mad at us?” Mom went to his side and hugged him. “He isn’t mad at you-he’s just too busy this weekend.” she said. The daughter had tears running down her face. “I really wanted to go today!” she wailed. Mom said “These things happen-but he’ll make it up to you, I promise!” The kitchen was quiet for a minute ,then the kids went back to finish their breakfast. When they finished they got up and put their dishes in the sink and went to watch T.V. After Mom cleaned up the kitchen she joined them in the living room. They were watching cartoons on a D.V.D. The son looked up at Mom and asked “Do you ever think about getting back together with Dad?” Mom took a deep breath and said “Your father wanted this- he’s been unhappy about the way his life was going.”The daughter turned and asked “So you don’t hate him, then?” Mom shook her head no. “I’m hoping we can be nice until we work things out for you guys.”she said. “Great-I don’t want today to happen again!” the son exclaimed. “I can’t wait to see if  we can live together as a family again.” the daughter chimed in. Mom laughed and said” Dad and I aren’t going anywhere.”She turned and fluffed up her pillow and added “We’re here for the both of you, no matter what happens.” They all came to hug each other then turned back to the television and watched cartoons the rest of the morning.